Return
On the nightstand: Podcasts. Specifically How it all began. "If that asteroid had been on a trajectory five minutes earlier or later, we wouldn't be here right now and the dinosaurs would still rule the planet."Coming through the speakers: Father John Misty. I've been listening to him much more than I should. I mean, he's good. But is he that good?
I fumbled with my keys at the front door. Wrong key. Or was it. A twist of the knob and I was home. Only, it didn’t feel like home.Two weeks. That’s all it took to put Seattle completely out of my mind. A pint at the Summit Pub brought back memories that felt years old. Cody was still cooking up toasty burritos. The Sunday crowd was still drinking far more than they should for a Sunday.Not even 12 hours after landing, I was back in the routine of work and emails and numbness.During an early morning commute, I caught myself asking “why are you here?” I don’t have any friends. I despise my job. I constantly dream of leaving this awkward fit that the West Coast offers. But I don’t. Why?For one, I’m tired. Exhausted. I don’t want to start over again. Not yet. Not now.Second, I’m sold on the potential. Niesel moving here. School (residency costs finally kicked in). A new job. A healthy body that would allow me to run; play soccer; do all those things that incite happiness.Until that potential kicks in, I'm reminded of the old coach-ism: "potential is another way of saying 'ain’t showed me nothing yet'.”