The Waiting Place
The Waiting Place...
"...for people just waiting.
Waiting for a train to go
or a bus to come, or a plane to go
or the mail to come, or the rain to go
or the phone to ring, or the snow to snow
or the waiting around for a Yes or No
or waiting for their hair to grow.
Everyone is just waiting.Waiting for the fish to bite
or waiting for the wind to fly a kite
or waiting around for Friday night
or waiting, perhaps, for their Uncle Jake
or a pot to boil, or a Better Break
or a string of pearls, or a pair of pants
or a wig with curls, or Another Chance.
Everyone is just waiting."
As with most waiting places, I don't know exactly when I arrived. It just sorta happened.
My job offer came through on July 5th. My application for New York State licensure to practice as a PA was submitted July 9th. Since then, I've slipped into the dreaded Dr. Seuss Waiting Place.
My application has yet to be processed by the state. Until it's processed, I am unable to apply for my DEA license. Without either, I'm unable to start work.
I've largely enjoyed the post-graduation summer. Bike rides. Peaches. Swimming. Friends. Moments of discontent have begun to make their mark however. The discontent is not borne of boredom. In fact, my days are as filled as they ever were. Guitar study. Writing. Reading. Studying, still (don't want to forget what I've learned). Touring.
Instead, it's derived from the sense of powerlessness that comes with engaging a bureaucratic machine. I've filed my paperwork. I've followed up with the authorities. I've done what I can. I have no choice but to wait.
Hidden within the shadows of discontent is the conspirator of poverty. The Waiting Place is unfortunately devoid of paychecks. I drive Lyft, though that resource has diminished as I question the worth of those earnings. Six-figure student loan debts do not disappear stresslessly into the night.
For three years, I pursued the goal of ultimately graduating from PA school. The pursuit was all-encompassing, robbing me of sleep, relationships, and piece of mind. Once that goal was realized, a well-needed break was scheduled. The batteries have since been rejuvenated. I'm now ready for the next challenge. I'm ready for the next pursuit.
But still I wait.